It’s been a hot minute since I have posted something for my Smackable collection, a collection I use to vent a little bit and get some of your feedback on the topic at hand. I am always interested in the comments that you leave when it comes to this series, and the poll results are always pretty funny as well.
This edition of Smackable will be nothing more than another bitch and gripe about the inconsiderate asshole drivers that dominate the roads here in sunny Florida. Any of you that follow me on Twitter know that on any given day of the week I can be seen tweeting road rage messages from the many morons I encounter on a typical drive to just about anywhere.
Florida is a state that has it all when it comes to the types of drivers that can be found on the roads here daily, everything from your fresh faced 15 year old to the recently deceased that still manage to drive, after death. I could probably spend countless hours bitching about the countless woman that I see feverishly rush to apply the 20 coats of paint they feel they need to be accepted in today’s society, while they drive of course.
I can even spend a fair amount of time on how I feel that having bicyclists “share the road” is one of the dumbest concepts I have ever heard of, and people are amazed that Florida is the leader when it comes to bicycle fatalities. Well no shit, they can be spotted cruising the right hand land in rush hour traffic as you try to dodge them, the dead drivers, the school bus’s and the 15 year olds that are all over the place at 8am every morning. I will save that for another day.
Before stopping to actually write this post I couldn’t figure out for the life of me why so many people drive slow as shit in the left hand lane here. Every road I have been on since I have lived in Florida seems to force you to use the right hand lane as the passing lane, instead of what just about all of us were taught when we first learned how to drive… The left lane is the passing lane, or the lane for faster moving traffic and the right lane is for slower moving traffic.
Seems pretty simple, if your a slow ass or your going to be getting off at the next exit you should probably stay to your right, and if your someone who actually knows where the hell you are going or someone that would like to at least do the speed limit than you should stick to the left hand lane. Simple, but not the case here in Florida.
Instead you are forced to sit behind two cars with drivers that are confused, the driver in the left hand lane is affraid of one of the dead people cruising off of a side street and plowing into them while they are in the right hand. The people in the right hand lane are working hard to dodge the bicycles that you need to “share the road with” at the same time they are watching for the dead people to plow into them at any given moment from a side street.
Loading ...Typically there is no where to go as both confused drivers pace each other at a speed limit typically 5-10mph BELOW what the posted speed limit states. As you wait for your moment to squeeze between them so you can get around them at some point and hopefully make at least one green light you have to be mindful of the maniac 15 year old that is behind you ignoring the fact that some asshole in front of you is actually the hold up.
All of the above goes on at an amazing pace, while you watch out for the countless “suicide” middle turning lanes that are on just about every road here in Florida. As if the bicycles, dead people, and left lane losers weren’t enough you have to make sure you don’t get drilled head on from someone launching out of a suicide lane at any time. All of which would be much less stressful if the left lane losers would just get in the f%$kin right hand lane or at least use the left hand lane as a “passing lane” instead of holding up traffic by pacing the car next to them.
Do you have Left Lane Losers where your from? Leave a comment and tell us about it.
Lee Ka Hoong@How To Blog (13)
SafariDave (13)
Ned Carey (9)
{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }
Aaargh! I hear you my man. They’re in C-Town too. LOL.
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yeah, It's nice, I don't like to be a slow ass, I don't like such peoples also, I want to be smart and alert, Ha ha. Thanks.
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Yeah, such “suicides” are usually happening, I want to drive as much as I can, I like to be the fastest one.
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I think this is not limited to Florida as it happens also half around the world like here in Manila. I don’t why there are so idiots driving the road.
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Florida doen’t own the monopoly on slow Left Lane Drivers. I just returned from California where I had to drive on the freeway (the 10, as they call it) waaay more than I ever wanted,to
There were plenty of drivers that needed to be passed in the right lane. And I mean the far right lane. This was on a four lane interstate.
And they has concrete barriers up next to the far left lane. Absolutely nerve racking to be driving right next to one of those barriers. And yet the slow people made it a point to continue blocking it, even next to the barriers. Unbelievable.
At least there was no suicide center turn lane on that interstate.
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